Who Am I? I'm not so sure. I know who I'm not. And that's enough for me.

I tend to behave like a Cat Girl child who was raised by Wild Wolves.

I know I like animals. And spanish. and sugar. I love babies and beaches. And Hair. And musicals. And Music.

I'm an afro-Latina. Proudly Puertorriqueña. Boldly Black. Simply beautiful. in my own lil way =]
I'm also a sister/daughter/friend. I'm an enemy to that which isn't for Life.

I am Feminine, not weak. Young, not immature. Ethnic, not exotic. Woman, not subservient.

I'm a lover. But i got some fight.

I love black. I love green. I bleed Red.

This spot should be as random as my life. And reflect some of the things I think/see/admire/whatever.

I read. I write. I'm Passionate. I'm humble. Lets Tumbl----
 
 
 

only one person has given me exactly what i wanted when it cones to people I’ve dated. I didn’t have to ask him for it either. I mentioned on my blog that i always wanted someone to ask me out for coffee. He saw it and did exactly that.

And you know, we had great conversations. We even went on a date, but that was before i realized that dating isn’t always best for me.

But, he’s a good person. And he paid attention. I didn’t have to beg for his attention…or wonder about his time and availability. it was there. PhD program and all.

I’m glad we’re still cool because he taught me a lesson. People will make time for things and people they like. There won’t be many questions left unanswered. No secrets. cards are on the table.

And most people choose not to pay close attention to things. this could include you. Don’t let it.

 
 
i waaaas going to go out tonight, but life happened and plans changed.

so i took a selfie.

i waaaas going to go out tonight, but life happened and plans changed.

so i took a selfie.

 
 

I am a Lexus

That no one wants to drive out the drive way

 
 

How do people even deal with homophobic parents??

like. I can’t…..

 
 

the struggle to not look at every visual representation of yourself and go

"christ i’m chunky/chubby"

is real.

 
 

why are my friends on here so nice…and so far??

dont make me want to relocate my life anymore than necessary!!!

on another note—is it weird that i like the “getting to know you” phase of a potential relationship more than the relationship itself?

 
 

Whenever I think that I am not a happy person..

I write, listen to some music…and i remind myself

Happiness is not a constant state of being. It fluctuates. It must be maintained. It is not static. It is motile. Fluid. It ebbs and flows. But to say that one is not a happy person…isn’t fair. I automatically deny myself happiness when I continue to speak such things.

Even if I an deeply unhappy in my moods..and even if these moods become more frequent again or last longer….I can still have happiness. I can still find joy.

They will not last forever. I can still be happy. I can choose to work towards happiness. It may be hard. But if I keep in mind to try and just be. happy. …Maybe I will find it along the way.

I can’t continue to destroy myself.

Who am I to think that I don’t deserve peace? That I am not good enough? That I don’t deserve happiness?

 
 
Control all of me. I just wanna be the girl you like…
 
 

It’s all I wanted. I just wanted to know that I was enough. I knew I was enough. I just wanted you to say it. I wanted you to know. 

I wanted you to acknowledge me. And you have. I got closure. How impossible is that….

 
 

sunset orange is prismatic. it shimmers and metamorphs. there are other colors present…various shades of reds and hints of violets and blues that become apparent…as you shift and move the color swatch.

that’s what makes it special……

 
 
Mom, people say that falling in love makes a girl beautiful, but does that mean she’ll stay grubby forever if she never loves anyone?
 
 

We all need something to believe in.

If I don’t believe in love
And I’m not enthralled by magic…

Then what will I believe in….

 
 
I no longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions or unnecessary conversations. If we don’t vibrate on the same frequency there’s just no reason for us to waste our time. I’d rather have no one and wait for substance than to not feel someone and fake the funk.
Joquesse Eugenia (via e-u-d-a-i-m-o-n-i-a)

(Source: wnderlst)

 
 

And just like that…..I realized that I could not care less about having love in my life…what I really want is happiness.